I missed the first custody-related court date because, perhaps ironically, I had to watch the kid. We don't have him this week, though, which freed me to go observe, and to make Anna laugh by writing snarky comments in my notebook.
Really, nothing in particular is happening except for the evaluation that we knew was going to happen. Nothing happened at the previous hearing, either, except that everything was deferred until today, when everything was further deferred until after the evaluation. I have realized that while my lawyer-parented childhood does qualify me to read and write legalese without fear, and to see Law and Government as meta-concepts fluidly manifesting in a specific sociohistorical context--not sure if that's what Dad meant for me to learn, but whatever--my lawyer-parented childhood did not include actual participation in court cases. This was obviously for the best all around, but the things they don't show on Law & Order include the endless possibilities to delay and distract the judge and the other party, and the interminable legal hoops that might need to be jumped through before the case is allowed to actually treat the issues involved. Lawyers have scheduling conflicts that magically disappear! Someone stomped out of mediation? Go back and try again! Ask for an expedited hearing? Granted! Will I admit or read any of your evidence at this time? I will not!
The wheels turn more slowly than I could have imagined. I think I have successfully re-calibrated my expectations.
None of this means it wasn't the right thing to do, because it was. It has already had noticeable benefits, and if it traded in for some new suckage, the previous suckage was wholly unacceptable. You can't make an omelet without shaking a few trees. It happens sometimes that the most right course, or the least wrong, is simply to go Fuck Some Shit Up™, even if you can't predict the outcome or consequences.
Shame on you Old Man…
3 months ago